Planes, airports and a near-death experience, but we made it

We're home at last and couldn't be happier about it as long as we don't think about going to work in two days...

After whiling away our last day nursing hangovers in the restaurant of our hotel, we got a tuk tuk out to Siem Reap airport for the first of four flights over 24 hours to get home.

All went according to plan for this flight until we were approaching Ho Chi Minh City, when the plane was caught in a storm. The sun had pretty much set, and when the sun sets in Asia darkness pretty much plummets, and the storm occurred right as the darkness was plummeting. We could see lightning ahead and a big, thick black cloud, and we plunged straight into this cloud and could see nothing around us. And then the turbulence started.

I'm not really a fan of flying at the best of times, and I've never liked turbulence, but this was insane. The plane was bucking up in the air, and then plunging down what seemed like a long way. There was lightning all around us and it seemed awfully close. Whenever a plane goes through turbulence I always look at the cabin staff to be reassured by their calm expressions, but all the staff on this flight pretty much disappeared and all the lights were turned off in the cabin, so we were just sitting in darkness holding hands and thinking the plane was about to crash.

As if flying isn't scary enough already, but when the wind is just tossing around this huge machine with casual abandon, and you know that if you crash you're certain to die, it's kind of terrifying.

Luckily, after about five minutes of this it calmed down a bit and the captain, who thankfully spoke good English, announced that he'd been ordered to keep a holding pattern in a clear spot until the storm moved away from the airport. This ended up lasting for about half an hour and there was still a bit of turbulence, and I don't think I breathed properly until we safely landed.

Luckily the weather had calmed down by the time we'd gone through customs to get into Vietnam, checked in for our next flight and then turned around and went back through customs to get out again, and waited the three hours for the next flight. An added comfort, as lame as it sounds, was the entirely Australian staff, which made us feel almost like we were in Australia again.

The next stop was Darwin, and again there was some bad weather going on there so we had yet more turbulence to deal with, although nothing like the last lot. After flying through the night and not getting any sleep we were completely buggered and almost blew off getting duty free stuff, but since we would have had a half hour wait to get through customs anyway, we braved the crowd in the tiny shop and came out with the allowed four litres of booze.

We had to declare some placemats we'd bought in Cambodia, and unfortunately they were deemed unsuitable for entry into Australia without treatment that would've cost three times what we paid for them, so they went in the bin.

Although we were back in Australia we were still only halfway home, but we'd dealt with customs for the last time at least. We had another four and a half hour flight to Sydney despite the fact that there were direct flights to Adelaide that would've got us home earlier. The flight was delayed, which was a bit of a worry since we'd allowed one and a half hours between landing in Sydney and getting on our next flight to Adelaide, but we ended up getting there in plenty of time for our last very uneventful flight (apart from, you guessed it, more turbulence).

Finally home, we were greeted by our rapturous dog and it couldn't have been a better night. We had showers for the first time in two days and in the first real shower in two weeks, we cooked a simple dinner, had a bottle of red and watched crap on telly. We put on a bread to be ready for breakfast this morning and we slept for 11 lovely hours in our own bed.

All we've really achieved other than doing our washing and our shopping is uploading all our photos. So if you've got the time and the patience, you can check them out here. They're in reverse order, so start with Sydney and work your way back. Beware that the Siem Reap album has shitloads of photos of temples which probably all look the same!

Overall, we're delighted to be home again and we had a great holiday. As George said in our last post, I'd recommend Cambodia to anyone as a holiday destination. The people were awesome, especially the kids. I wanted to take one home with me. The food is great and it's generally dirt cheap (you'd struggle to pay more than $US6 for a meal, and that'd be a very fancy number indeed). The currency is a bit confusing, as they deal in $US as well as the local riel, and you'll usually get change with a bit of both, since $US1 = 4000 riel. And you can't deal only in riel either since the ATMs only dispense $US. But it's easy to get used to after a while, unless you've run your change down and you've only got a 50 dollar note, then you might be in trouble unless you're in a restaurant that's likely to have large denomination notes!

The only real downside of Cambodia is that there are only a couple of main highways in the country, so getting around is a bit of a problem. You can't really get from one main area to another without having to go back to Phnom Penh to get another bus out, so unless you've got a month to see it all, you'll end up spending half your holiday travelling between places, or spend a lot of money getting taxis across the country. But even this is changing. While most of the roads are dirt roads in terrible condition, there will be an effort in the near future to completely upgrade the only railway in the country so that fast trains can travel on them, and with the increase in tourism, eventually the roads will be paved and travel will be faster.

Anyway, I've gone on for long enough, so here endeth our travel tales for this year. I'm not sure where or when we'll go next, but I'm sure it won't be long before we start thinking about it again!

The final countdown

We're off in five and a half hours, but Cambodia being Cambodia, we need to leave in three.

Yesterday was the intended low-key affair. After our last report, we wandered up the road to the somewhat pointless royal gardens and further on to find a place reputed to have fine miniatures of the Angkor temples. We found the right street but despite signs pointing directly to it we couldn't find the place and instead ended up at this awesome-looking hotel seemingly in the middle of nowhere, where we asked for directions and, fortuitously, I found the country's best toilet facilities.

With the aid of the hotel staff's directions we found the place, and it was $3 poorly spent - I must admit the replica of Angkor Wat was pretty spectacular, but the place itself was just some dude's back yard, and it really was a ramshackle organisation. This done and no other plans to speak of we braved the belting heat and stumbled around the Pub Street area looking for somewhere besides Pub Street to eat. We settled on a Lonely Planet recommendation, the Blue Pumpkin, which had great sandwiches and even better pastries - I had a pineapple flan and it blew me up.

Full and buggered from not much at all we decided we'd earned a beer and sat down at the first place offering 50c draught beers. We moved onto several others, of course returning to Pub Street for the kick-off of major happy hours (although many pubs have permanent happy hours anyway). We arrived at Angkor What...? and ran into a Kiwi couple we'd seen around the temple tracks over the past day or so. We joined them for a drink and got stuck into the place's signature drink - a literal bucket, like a plant pot, of booze. We had gin and tonics, each consisting of a bucket of ice, a full tumbler glass of gin and one can of tonic. It was madness. Frankly I was bombed after this one drink and paid no attention to the Apsara dancing going on at the pub across the road when we were eating our somewhat forgettable dinner.

With energy waning the four of us came back to the hotel (turns out by coincidence the Kiwi couple were staying at the same place) and foolishly I got another beer while the Kiwis chatted to some Welsh or Scottish dudes who'd just flown in. Bec had the right idea and promptly fell asleep next to me. With that idea gaining weight I took us to bed and pretty much passed out.

This morning has just consisted of the boring-arsed packing thing so there's nothing to report, although I must say I am relishing being on the path back home, despite it being certain to be a nightmare. I will however take the opportunity to make a few random reflections on Cambodia.

* The two major beers here are named 'Anchor' and 'Angkor'. This would have problems for any narrow-minded beer drinking culture, but the Khmers have a simple remedy - 'Anchor' is pronounced as it actually looks - 'An-Chaw'. Simple but effective, like most of the local innovations.

* Local innovations: both the Vietnamese and the Khmers are brilliantly adaptable people. The way they resolve problems and get things done with sheer inventiveness is unceasingly inspiring. Everywhere you go you see these innovations in practice; bicylces doubling as food stalls, single engines driving a tiny but powerful tractor capable of pulling heavy loads at reasonable speeds, boat motors that collect coolant water off its own rotor, amputees using reversed bikes to pedal with their hands; endless adaptability.

* The good nature of the Khmers in the face of seemingly impossible adversity. They simply don't get angry, and they don't hold grudges. They have even made an 'agreement' with the remnants of the Khmer Rouge. This itself is unfathomable to me, but it what makes the community work. They are also incredibly undemanding; despite the occasional harassment from touts and food and souvenir sellers, the great majority of people just smile and say hello. Kids in particular love it when you so much as wave or smile at them; say hello back and they'll pretty much explode. It's awesome. The kids are also amazingly happy; Bec's driver on one of our Battambang tours said that Cambodian kids always smile because they're happy with what they have. It should be an inspiration to us.

* A random recollection so far unreported: when we were heading back from our first day of temple bashing, our driver pulled up just short of our hotel as a group of kids seemingly rode straight into the path of traffic. But rather than this being what I assumed to be a petty rebellion, two phallanxes of boys on bikes made a barricade across the road to allow younger students to leave safely at the end of the school day. Only a few impatient drivers went through or around the barricade; the great majority waited until the bike riding crossing guards had fulfilled their duties. It was a great sight and I regret not getting a photo.

* Bike culture starts early here. Before they can even reach the pedals, kids are riding adult bicycles, standing on the pedals and riding as well if not better than you or I could now. There'd be kids no older than 4 riding like this; you can't really envisage it until you see it.

I'm sure there are other little snippets like this I could add; as I remember them I'll try to record them here. We'll do another post when we've got our photos safely downloaded and online.

As a final note before we depart, I'd just like to heartily recommend this country to travellers from all spectrums. You could have any kind of holiday you wanted here - budget or big spender travellers can all have a great time. The temples shouldn't have to be the be all and end all of a trip to Cambodia; the people are what make it a great country. We'll almost certainly be back one day and I think now we'll struggle to enthuse ourselves to see any more of Vietnam when this place has most of what Vietnam has to offer, and so much more just in its people.

It's been fun reporting to you all, and of course for our own record of this journey. We hope it inspires many more people to come to Cambodia. Those who have been before us will also sing its praises.

All that said, there's no place like home and we'll see you all there again soon.

George and Bec.

Planes, buses, tuktuks, temples and other debacles

One more day and we'll be on the way home, since we finally sorted out our lost ticket debacle. Well, not really sorted out at all, but more about that later.

After our last report post-Angkor Wat, we headed back to 'Pub Street' and landed at the Angkor What...? bar, a cool little pub type bar with the slogan 'promoting irresponsible drinking for xx years', and this was certainly the case, with happy hour including pitchers (yes, whole jugs) of cocktails for only $6. We promptly ordered a pitcher of Angkor Sunset, which was something like a Tequila Sunrise, but had different stuff. Can't remember now, for obvious reasons. After consuming all 6 glasses from the pitcher, we went for dinner at the Red Piano, which was bloody tasty, then a post-dinner drink before getting a tuk tuk back to our hotel to crash out.

Yesterday began bright and early with our trusty tuk tuk driver/guide picking us up at 7.30 and taking us on the very long and bumpy drive to the River of 1000 Lingas, visiting a couple of temples on the way. The river is famous for the 1000s of years old carvings in the stone along the riverbed, most of them depicting a linga (phallic symbol of the power of the Hindu god Shiva), but also some other more intricate people and animals. It was truly cool, especially considering that the carvings are still there after however many years of rushing water passing over them. The whole experience was enhanced by the 1.5km walk to get there through the jungle, clambering over giant rocks and tree roots (typical Cambodian OH&S observed at all times, of course).

After returning to the tuk tuk we needed to put some more fuel in our tanks, so we had a quick lunch there before heading to Bantay Srei, a sandstone temple that had a slightly pink hue caused by moss (apparently). That was quite cool too, and a bit different from most of the others we'd seen.

I think we saw another two or three on the way back, but they're all starting to blur into one now. One stood out for the two giant trees that were growing together over the entrance to the temple, simultaneously knocking it down and holding it up at the same time.

The last, Preah Khan, was an absolutely huge sprawling temple with many different chambers, with one side built for the Buddha and one for the Hindu gods. Over the years Cambodia has switched between being a Hindu and a Buddhist country, and this temple was built during the time that both religions existed alongside one another. Later, when Hinduism was predominant, the king of the time had all images of the Buddha removed from this temple, but then when Buddhism returned, they thought they'd set a good example and leave the Hindu images intact - thus they were the bigger people in the end. When we first walked into this temple a tourist police guy asked us if he could tell us the story of the temple, and he took us through the whole thing and told us plenty of tales about its history, which was pretty cool. At the end he asked for a 'donation' since he was paying for English lessons and trying to get better. After his efforts this was understandable, although it was a bit much when he asked for more than what we gave him! Nevertheless, we handed it over for a service well rendered, and finally made it back to our hotel after about 10 hours of touring.

After a shower and a bit of a rest we headed back to Pub Street (again) and returned to the Angkor What...? for yet another pitcher of Angkor Sunset. Here we shared a table with a couple of French guys who've been living here for five months and were indulging in their own happy hour excess - pots of rum and coke. They were literally served in plant pots, and only cost $5. I imagine we will probably be trying those tonight - same price for a pot of G&T too!

We chatted to these very affable blokes for a while before making our escape before George was tempted to buy his own pot of rum and coke, and went to the night markets to do a bit of last minute souvenir shopping. The markets in themselves were very cool, and very different from most of the crowded, claustrophobic messes of markets you usually find in Asia. They were roomy, and looked more like a mall than a market, and each main wing had a bar with a happy hour if you needed a break amid shopping (and probably, the influence of alcohol to cause you to buy more). The shop owners don't hassle you much at all (unlike Benh Than markets in Ho Chi Minh, where you can't walk three steps without people grabbing your arm and saying 'What you looking for, miss?'), and while the prices are a bit higher, you can still bargain for discounts. We had one drink at a bar and watched a couple of enthusiastic bar tenders giving non stop Cocktail-style demonstrations with glasses and bottles, then bought the requisite stuff we'd decided on.

After this we returned to Pub Street and indulged in that staple that we can never do without for longer than a couple of weeks - Indian food. And it was bloody good too.

After dinner we were full and buggered, so we went back to the hotel for a nice long sleep.

We've decided that we're a bit templed out now, so we had the first relaxed morning for several days. We probably won't be making use of the third day of our temple tickets (same price for 2 or 3 days, so we've talked ourselves into it being value for money anyway), but we'd like our last day here to be a bit more laid back.

We began after breakfast by trying once again to solve the problem of our lost flight tickets. Let me explain the whole story - we booked the flight from Siem Reap to HCMC, to connect with our flight back to Australia, online using a travel website called expedia.com. They sent us paper tickets (first bad thing), and the flight was with Vietnam Airlines (which should have been enough of a warning after our experience with them last year).

Somewhere along the way (no idea where), we lost the pouch of important shit (which contained our passports and tickets, but luckily we'd taken the passports out of it to get through customs). We didn't realise we'd lost it until we were about to cross the border into Cambodia and were looking for the departure card we'd got in the Vietnam airport. One calamity after another got in the way of us sorting out the problem - the first being the two day holiday for the water festival (Khmer translation - one week) meaning that the Vietnam Airlines office was closed when we were in Phnom Penh and we couldn't contact them by phone for the whole week either.

When we finally arrived in Siem Reap, we went to the Vietnam Airlines office here, only to find out that although it was a Vietnam Airlines flight, and booked through the Expedia website, we somehow needed to 'report' the lost tickets to China Air. When we did this they said they'd call us at the hotel, which they did yesterday, but of course we were out until 6pm and couldn't call back. This morning the hotel owners kindly called them for us (this was after they'd lost the number and had to go through the bin to find it), and the outcome was that we had to go to Phnom Penh TODAY in order to pick up the reissued tickets to fly from here to HCMC. (look on a map - Siem Reap is at the top of the country, Phnom Penh at the bottom, closer in fact to HCMC. We would have had to get a bus to Phnom Penh (6 hours), pick up the tickets (except that the office would be closed by the time we got there), then get a bus all the way back up here in order to fly back over Phnom Penh to HCMC. Cambodian logic). The only other option would be to delay our flight another day, which was impossible since we're flying back to Australia tomorrow night.

So our only option was to buy the tickets again and hope that our travel insurance will reimburse us the money once we get home. We know it's our fault, but really, how bloody ridiculous is this system?! It's very frustrating, but at this point we're happy to have spent another $260 just to know we're going home tomorrow. And on a positive note, the people at our hotel are so helpful - if we'd had to try to discuss this over the phone in English it would have been even more of a debacle.

This sorted, we're now going into town to look at shit and generally have a relaxed day. Very much looking forward to being on the way home, and even more to actually getting home to our own bed and animals and cooking our own food.

Will probably report again tomorrow before we leave. Cheers.

Drop the Angkor, we need a break

George reporting from Siem Reap, following our first day in Cambodia's answer to Disney Land - the temples of Angkor.

Since our last report we have done a lot of travel and not much else until today. After our last report, we had the last Battambang supper at the long-awaited Smokin' Pot. We both had very traditional Khmer dishes - Bec had fish Amok and I had the 'fire mountain', in other words marinated beef you cook yourself on a portable stove. It was really good. Unfortunately for Bec, hers didn't rock so much. We finished our last night somewhat later than ideal for our 7am departure the next day; Bec was coerced into my game of Texas Hold'em with Brett, manager of the Bus Stop guesthouse where we'd stayed, and his wife, Tia (also coerced). It was fun, especially since with a generous scoop of good luck, I won the pot!

Anyhow, the journey to Siem Reap along the Sangker River almost didn't begin at all; the bus driver forgot us, and a frantic tuk tuk driver was sent after us. Given we were late we were relegated to the back seats, also known as the outdoor engine compartment. Quickly deafened by the engine and whipped by branches as we cruised down tiny canals, we followed the crowd onto the roof of the boat, where the journey rapidly improved. It was damn hot, but the views were magnificent, and by hanging one's legs over the side it wasn't terribly uncomfortable.

Making it to shore after a run across Tonle Sap lake we were accosted by (allegedly) starving kids, tuk tuk drivers and other dodgy scammers. We'd fallen for the oldest scam in the book and given our names to some bloke on the boat who had this rather logical piece of paper arguing that since our hotel booked the boat we also had free transport to our accommodation. Lesson number one in not getting ripped off in developing nations: outlandish lies are no problem at all, and they'll smile and nod while telling you complete crap. The guy set to deliver us to our hotel was horrified when we said we'd already booked a place, since the scam involves your 'free' trip being entirely dependent on you staying wherever your tuk tuk driver takes you - that being the place paying him commission. So we ended up in a pain-in-the-rectum argument about the fact we'd already paid deposits etc, we weren't changing our accommodation, how much is fair, and eventually settled on $4, a ludicrously inflated price given his lies about how much further from the city our hotel was (it was also terrible according to him, but it's the second best place we've been).

The other challenge disembarking was these kids trained to be perfect parasites, wanting to eat anything we had and offering nothing but rudeness and boisterousness in return. In fact they even participated in one poor soul from our boat ending up on her backside on the muddy banks of the lake. She must be a saint 'cause she laughed it off. I would have been swinging punches (except they were 10 or less, so not really, but they p*ssed me off anyway).

Anyhow, whinging aside, we got to our hotel and it's fantastic. The family running the place are extremely friendly and I've been locked onto by one of the kids who's wrapped that I think his Borat impersonation is hilarious (which it is). After settling in we had a few beers and listened to the kid's awesome iPod playlist then headed to the infamous Bar Street aka Pub Street, and no prizes for guessing what we did there. Not a lot to report except awesome happy hour prices: for two beers and two cocktails between us we left a total of $5. Sweet.

Starvingly hungry we went the pizza option, at the dubiously named 'Ecstatic Pizza' where, unsurprisingly, they'll put a little something special on your pizza if you so desire. We decided to chance it and, again unsurprisingly, nothing happened. That said, we did get very tired very quickly and ended up crashing out before 10.

This morning we had our first of three days touring the temples, the raison détre of Siem Reap in the tourist age. We had a tuk tuk driver for the whole day and took full advantage of this by getting him to first take us to Vietnam Airlines with the hope of sorting out a ticketing debacle (no such luck). We began our adventures at Bayon, a temple coverered in zany faces, then went on to Priminekas and the Elephant and Leper King walks. We then went to a couple of lesser temples and onto the highlight of the day, the overgrown Ta Prohm, the scene of the first Tomb Raider film. Don't let that put you off; it's amazing. Trees grow on top of towers and walls. Massive root systems dwarf statues and other formations. Everywhere nature is defeating this timeless construction. It's awesome.

Frankly, it was a bit downhill from there. It was hot, damn hot, and we were already buggered by 1. Stopping for lunch at 2 charged the batteries a bit, but we had the biggest - and ostensibly best - yet to come. Our driver dropped us to the back of Angkor Wat, which saved us some tourist angst, but also probably enhanced the let down factor a bit. There's not much 'wow' at the back, although it does get pretty impressive as you work your way into the four layers of the central towers. Unfortunately the peaks themselves are now off limits - permanently or temporarily we don't know. But we finished off with the requisite photos of the front of the Wat, across its massive moats etc. The photos do look impressive, but after a whole day of temples, heat and some harrassment, we were a bit over it (that said, as an aside, there was a mysterious absence of the kids trying to sell you useless crap within the building itself - perhaps authorities have seen sense and banned the practice within the country's most holy building).

So now we're showered and prepared to hit Bar/Pub Street again. We have another, hopefully shorter, temple day tomorrow and we will report back then.

Farewell.

The day the boy became a man

Today, George conquered several fears, and with great aplomb I might add.

We decided to do another day tour, considering the stinkin' Smokin' Pot was still not open so we couldn't do the cooking class today, but at $20 per person it was starting to get a bit pricey, so our hotel host suggested a slightly cheaper alternative: get one guide to take me on the back, and rent a motorcycle for the day for George to ride. I was dubious but he was keen, so we decided to do it.

He started out with a quick tutorial in our street, which, although not manically busy, was quite busy enough for someone who hadn't ridden a motorbike for at least 10 years, and never on the right side of the road, and certainly never in a foreign country that has no road rules whatsoever. This achieved with some success, we set off, with me looking over my shoulder every five seconds to make sure he was still following and not flattened on the road.

But, all things considered, he did a very good job, despite me shitting myself on his behalf the whole way, and about an hour later we arrived at an enormous lake that is apparently 8km wide, and during the Khmer Rouge regime had been dammed, at the expense of many more lives, so that the country could produce two crops of rice per year rather than just one.

We then went on a mildly scary ride in a small rowboat that not only had a leak in it, but had very low sides so that anytime we moved, a bit of water would tip in. George was given a plate for the purpose of bailing out water as we went, and although the patch of lotus plants and flowers that we went through was beautiful, I was very keen to get back to shore asap, particularly since the kid who was rowing us was whispering to himself every now and then and sounded slightly psychotic. Turns out he wasn't, but still, when you can't swim very well and you're in the middle of a lake in a leaky boat, you don't tend to feel very confident.

Reaching the shore again with the boat and our lives still intact, we had a quick wander along the shore where there was supposed to be a row of Khmer restaurant stalls, but it didn't look like anyone was cooking anything (and with an hour's ride back on the bike with no facilities in sight, we wouldn't have risked having lunch there anyway). So we got back on the bikes for a long, bumpy and very dusty trip back to Battambang.

After long showers to get rid of the dust, George then conquered his second fear by taking me as a pillion passenger on the back of the bike to a local restaurant. After a bit of a shaky start where we almost cleaned up a few very alarmed girls, he got the hang of the extra weight pretty quickly and we had a very tasty lunch at the restaurant.

But this wasn't until he'd conquered his third fear - using the dubious dunny with no toilet paper and no time to get anywhere else. I won't go into details, but he claims he is now a new man after the experience (in fact, after two as it turns out).

After lunch we decided to explore a bit further and rode through a picturesque village along the river where there were a lot of temples and a lot of happy smiling kids waving wildly to us as we went past and screaming out 'Hello! Hello! Hello!' and then squealing with delight when we waved back. The road just kept going for ages so we followed it until we came to a bloody steep hill going downwards and George decided that his confidence wasn't quite up to this task, so we turned around, much to the amusement of a bunch of locals.

We went back to the hotel and sat out the front for a while with a couple of beers and read our books, then retired to our room for a lie down for another hour or so. We've just emerged now and are about to have dinner at aforementioned stinkin' Smokin' Pot (it re-opened today, just in time for us to piss off tomorrow). After this our hotel guy is going to teach George how to play Texas Hold'em Poker and I'll probably watch that for about half an hour before going to bed.

Tomorrow we're up bright and early to get the 7 hour boat to Siem Reap. It's supposed to be the most beautiful boat ride in Cambodia, but we're hoping it might be a bit ahead of schedule. After tonight we've only got four more nights in Cambodia before we begin our arse journey back. We're both missing home and looking forward to getting back into a normal routine, but will have to steel ourselves for the tourist nightmare that lies ahead.

Metal cows and Cambodian snow

No, Bec and I have not been sampling Cambodia's infamous 'happy pizza'; these are just a few of our learnings from our just completed moto tour of Battambang's countryside.

But let me bring you up to speed.

After our last report, we did what we'd promised to ourselves we'd use Battambang to do - nothing. We went to the room, turned on the fan, a/c and CNN and slept - a thoroughly decadent experience for me (that said I was feeling poorly). Whenwe finally dragged ourselves out of the room again we couldn't really be buggered with traipsing back to the river front for dinner so instead did a dusty and futile walk around the three main streets looking for somewhere to kill time before dinner. We settled on a nice looking first floor balcony called 'Gecko', a restaurant/bar/massage parlour to which we'd received free drink vouchers. After a couple of G&Ts all inspiration to move on left us, so we got a cop-out dinner of burgers and fries from the same joint (and I thought my burger rocked, so score one to me).

With full bellies and desire for more drinks waning rapidly we retired to our hotel, where despite my not particularly wanting to drink I still managed to bring our foolish Phnom Penh purchase of a bottle of gin downstairs to drink with the hotel owner while he battled the Mac settings on my iPod in an ultimately fruitless attempt to reverse tunes off it. It can be done; oh yes, it can be done.

After too many gins I stumbled upstairs (Bec had made the right call earlier) only to find Die Hard III on. So an early night was scotched.

This morning we finally got out and about. We'd organised a tour through our hotel and got two bikes and guides to take us around local Battambang sites. The highlights included a ride on what's called the Bamboo Train, a highly dodgy contraption that runs a thin bamboo platform at high speed across some of the worst train track in the world. Although it'd meet no safety standards whatsoever, it was damn good fun and we got to see some fantastic scenery, including rice fields stretching to the horizon.

We also went to an Angkor-style temple at the peak of a decent climb, and later to what's colloquially known as Boat Mountain, the home to legends about the foundation of Cambodia's terra firma. The walk and the guide's input were both fascinating. The walk also took us through another of the Khmer Rouge's litany of offenses against humanity; a gaping hole in the earth leading to a cave and a 30 foot fall for anyone who fell foul of the regime's insane intolerance. It was sickening but moving.

We finished with a dusty trek through village territory where I learned the two terms that headline this yarn: Cambodian snow is a polite term for the choking dust thrown up by the myriad cars, trucks, motos and tuk tuks that gradually tear up the roads, and metal cows are modernity's answer to an ox-pulled plough. It's a fascinating place, and if you ever come here I'd recommend the same two guides we had.

Having returned to the (relative) safety and cleanliness of our hotel, we shouted our guides a beer then headed back to the rocking nameless noodle place for lunch. We've had a few beers and there's not many plans for the remainder of the day aside from showers, more beers and maybe drinks and dinner at the Riverside Balcony.

We're spewing that the Smoking Pot remains shut despite a re-opening date of 13 November, but it seems Vietnamese 'rubber time' applies here too. As a result we might do another tour tomorrow, but for now it's time for cleaning, napping, and perhaps even learning the art of Texas Hold'em from our colourful (and somewhat bogan) hotellier.

Need a slash. Cheers.

Battered in Battambang

Our journey to Battambang was fairly uneventful - for a 5 1/2 hour trip it was comfortable enough, with a few stops on the way to stretch our legs and use the somewhat dubious facilities. We had a free pick up arranged with our hotel, and they'd asked us to get off on the western side of the river, but of course the bus stopped on the eastern side and everyone piled off, with us just sitting there wondering if we should stay on or not. Looking out of the window, there were numerous moto-taxis holding up signs for hotels, and then I spotted this guy right out our window holding up a sign that said 'George & Bec'.

We had our first experience on motos, luggage and all, and were relieved that staying on without holding the guy around the waist like a tool was actually quite easy, particularly considering I was holding a water bottle and a Pringles (known here as 'Mister Potato Crisps') container in one hand.

We were greeted at our hotel by the Australian owner, who turns out to be from a suburb near to us in Adelaide. Small world. Our room here is not quite up to the standards of our last hotel, but we've got a king size bed, surprisingly enough. In keeping with our usual tradition of missing out or misinterpreting things, it turns out that the 'super fast internet' is actually 'super fast wifi', and since we didn't bring our laptop (stupid! stupid!), we miss out on that too. So we're in an internet cafe with tolerable speeds, but there'll be no photo uploading until we get home, unfortunately.

After we'd settled into our hotel we headed out to get our bearings, which was hardly difficult since this is quite a small and very laid back town. Our first stop was a cafe reputedly owned by bible bashers (found this out afterwards), where we had an iced coffee/chocolate/caramel concoction, which was kind of weird but tasty. It even had coffee ice cubes in it.

After this we went to a rooftop bar in a hotel nearby for a few beers and watched the sun go down, before trying to find a restaurant recommended by the Lonely Planet, which also runs Khmer cooking classes. Once again we missed out, as it was closed for the public holidays, which although only technically on Tuesday and Wednesday, seem to be liberally applied to the entire week. So we went to another small restaurant that had fairly good and very cheap meals, and I finally had a glass of red wine, which I've been missing (even though it was served cold).

After dinner we went back to our hotel and had several beers with the owner (out of Aussie stubbie holders - I had a Ballina RSL Club one) and listened to music and chatted. He's got a huge DVD collection, and later he put on a best of the Late Show CD where I finally learnt the origin of 'like a tiger' (doesn't make sense without hearing it though).

Finally we crashed out and had a very long sleep before going down for vegemite toast for breakfast - vegemite was good, bread was crap, but what can you do.

We then set out on an extended walk of the 'city limits', which took us a total of about an hour, including a stop for a drink on the way. We saw the statue at the entrance to the town, which is a giant god like creature called Dambong, holding some magic stick thing (the bat of Dambong, namesake of the town). We also walked past the governor's residence, a slightly shabby looking old French mansion which must have been very impressive once.

And that's kind of it for our sightseeing around here. We got more fruit shakes from a cafe, then went to a noodle place for a very tasty lunch before this update. Tomorrow we're planning to do a day tour out to the countryside and see some temples and some 'caves 'n' shit', as George says, with moto drivers who speak good English. And if the bloody place ever opens again we'll try to do the cooking class on the day after.

Nothing else to report really - it's two o'clock and we're out of things to do (if you ever come here, maybe only spend two nights in Battambang, not four). I'm sure you can guess where we'll be off to next.

Seeya.

Thrashed out and on the way out

Knackered. Seriously knackered. It's 8pm and we're back in our hotel. Let me explain.

After an unexpectedly crazy Monday night c/o altruistic Canadians and a complete lack of self control we had a late start and barely managed to hold down breakfast (OK, that's an exaggeration, but I felt poorly). Finally making it out of here around 10.30 we caught the same tuk tuk driver and went to the Royal Palace. His tourist senses must have been sleeping because the damn thing was shut for the public holiday, Silver Pagoda and all. If we'd been less lazy and less desperate for a beer on any other given day we could have gone into it. Oh well.

Having failed (epic) on the Royal Palace thing, we did a lame tourists' walk around the boundary, taking a few snaps through the gates - it is quite a spectacular-looking compound - then went to the national museum which was, luckily, open. That was pretty cool overall, loaded with a bizarre mix of religious iconography and statues coming out of its jaxie.

We'd developed a thirst by then, and not quite ready for the demon drink we stopped in at a fantastic fruit juice/smoothie joint where we downed some much needed dragon fruit and tangerine drinks. Our planned walk took us past the Independence Monument once again, and soon enough we'd ended up at Ph 57, our latest favourite street. We were hunting some bar called 'Gasolina', but needing fuel for the journey we stopped at the Green Mango for lunch.

After an unsuccessful jaunt up part of 57 we returned to the scene of last night's debacle, or the beginning of it anyway, where Bec had initially seen the advertisement for the photo exhibition we'd been looking for. I had a beer and Bec had a passionfruit and Cambodian honey smoothie, which truly rocked, just for sake of appearances, before we headed off again seeking this mysterious Gasolina place.

Despite my misgivings, we continued along 57 well past the known tourist zone and eventually stumbled onto Gasolina, which turns out to be this fantastic garden bar/bed sit/art zone. We'd come specifically to see a photo display called 'Smile Cambodia' which set up 8 or 10 young kids living literally on a landfill in Phnom Penh with cameras and sent them out to document their city. The pics are awesome and incredibly emotive; we'll be buying a few things from them I reckon. I should also mention about the bar itself that seating primarily consisted of massive outdoor covered beds with massive pillows; if we'd arrived earlier I could have been in a lot of trouble.

Having had a Tiger and some crazy Belgian beer we jumped on a tuk tuk and headed to the other side of the city i.e. ours and had drinks at the Raffles-owned Hotel Le Royale, which, as the name suggests, is like something out of a Bond movie. The Elephant Bar, where we drank, is the plushest (and potentially overpriced) joint in town, so we timed our landing to coincide with happy hour - cocktails $4 US or thereabouts; expensive by local standards, but stand-out cocktails.

With motivation waning we stumbled to a German and Swiss restaurant immediately behind the hotel and ate a very German meal - mostly meat. We didn't even finish the one beer we ordered between us and we're now back at the hotel, conveniently close to bed around 8:30.

Tomorrow we're off to Battambang, and I'm looking forward to 4 days of not much at all. We'll report again from there.

Getting an edumacation in Cambodian history

Yesterday morning we started out bright and early by organising a tuk tuk driver who could take us around to various places and wait for us at each. The hotel reception told us that what we had in mind would cost around $US15, so we went outside prepared to haggle, but to our surprise the first tuk tuk driver we saw said he'd do it for $10. So we immediately agreed to this without any argument and we set off to the Vietnam Airlines office to see if we could have our lost plane tickets from Siem Reap to HCMC replaced (another story).

Our driver had a bit of trouble finding the place and stopped to ask various of his mates if they knew how to get there along the way, but finally we found it only to discover that, although yesterday wasn't a public holiday (today and tomorrow are), the office was closed anyway. So we still don't know how we're going to go with that, but we'll have to wait until Thursday to find out now.

After this our driver took us out to the Killing Fields, about 15km out of Phnom Penh and the site of mass murder by the Khmer Rouge. The centrepiece of the place is a giant enclosed temple with clear glass in the centre encasing hundreds and hundreds of skulls, many of them with gunshots, cracks from beatings with blunt objects and hacking from machetes. It was bloody horrible. The actual site is beautiful, surrounded by trees and lush green grass, but everywhere there are sunken holes where mass graves have been unearthed. There's not much in the way of information there, except for here and there a sign next to a tree stating that it was used for tying up children to beat them, or to rig up a sound device to drown out the sounds of the victim's moans. It was bloody horrible.

When we were leaving our tuk tuk driver told us that he didn't really like going out there because his father had to flee Phnom Penh during the regime because he was a university lecturer and anyone with any education was persecuted.

After this we went to the genocide museum, which was even worse if such a thing is possible. It's at the site of an old school which was converted into a detention centre by the Khmer Rouge and all the old classrooms were used for interrogation and torture. It's been pretty much untouched since and it's a horrible feeling to wander through rooms that saw so much cruelty. There was another room that went through the entire history of the regime, and it's hard to believe that all of this happened in our lifetimes (well, partly in mine - 1975-79). But the worst part for me was the rooms filled with the 'mug shots' of the victims. It was forbidden for them to cry, protest or complain, but you could see the fear and hopelessness in their eyes because they knew what was in store for them.

And then to top it all off when we came out and got back into our tuk tuk we were approached by a beggar who looked like he'd had acid thrown in his face or something, because all his skin was gone and half of his face with it. We didn't give him anything, because you're not really supposed to, but I felt worse than shit as we drove away and shed some tears as we continued on to our next destination.

After this we were in dire need of a beer or 10 to get over this whole experience, so we bid our driver goodbye and, with a bit of difficulty, eventually found a French restaurant recommended by the Lonely Planet Guide. This was definitely the highlight of the day - the food was absolutely awesome and better than anything we had when we were in France! George had a steak that was apparently very tasty, and I had grilled fish, and we also had some great desserts afterwards. Very very good, and highly recommended.

By the time we got out of there it was about 4.30 or thereabouts, so we decided to find a bar and settle in somewhere. Once again we fortuitously turned up right in time for happy hour (75c beers) and, although we'd only intended to be there for a drink or two, we got talking to a dude from Canada who has been working on a community project in Siem Reap with Habitat for Humanity, building houses for the poor. It sounds really interesting and something we might look into doing on our next holiday.

After many beers we stumbled on to another bar that had awesome $3.50 cocktails, so we had a couple of these each before deciding it was probably time to get back to our hotel and crash out (particularly since we hadn't had any dinner after our very big and very late lunch). We're a bit slow this morning, but we've only got a few more things to see today so we're going to take it easy. This is our last day here and we're sorry to leave, because we love it here. Although we loved Vietnam, we've decided that Cambodia kicks its arse all over the place. We were expecting it to be far less developed as a tourist destination than Vietnam, but it's heaps better, and easier, and friendlier, and this city is really beautiful - there's such a big French influence, and some of the boulevards wouldn't look out of place in Paris.

Tomorrow we get a bus to Battambang for another four days, but no doubt we'll check in again before we leave. The internet here might be slow, but it's free, and you can't kick a gift horse in the mouth as one slightly imbecilic person once said.

Seeya

Crashing the nation's biggest party

We have a knack for interesting timing - we discovered, purely by throngs of people on the streets, a carnival atmosphere and stalls, floats and promos everywhere that yesterday (Sunday) was Cambodia's Independence Day. It's also quickly approaching the water festival which apparently celebrates the reversing of the Mekong's flow.

After we'd finally made it out of here yesterday we somewhat lamely followed the Lonely Planet's walking tour of the city. It took us past some magnificent French colonial buildings and into some intense experiences, such as the city's biggest market, Psar Themei. This outdoor shanty market, leaning onto the sides of a circular indoor market, is a mass of smells, colours and activity, very much for locals. We saw the lot - live water snakes (a.k.a. eels, I'm told), live crabs, bizarre fruit and vegetables etc. It was intensified by the extremely low canvas roof that dropped filth water on my prone noggin and grubby water all over the place. Interesting nonetheless.

We contrasted this experience with the very middle class new shopping mall/centre which was hospital-hygenic next to Psar Themei. It was also entirely lacking in soul and reeked of decadence and ostentatious affluence. Most bizarre was the supermarket itself which seemed to be almost dedicated to baby and youth products, particularly food supplements that will help your baby grow up big and strong. It seems the wealthiest and healthiest Cambodians are either tall, fat or both, and it seems a sign of achievement to be such. I guess the country's history explains this in part; the many wars and genocidal leaders of recent decades have literally decimated the nation's age profile, such that elderly people are extremely few and far between. In fact, most of the elders appear to be monks. There seems to be a 'baby culture' where advertising is targeted very much on one's responsibility to raise healthy (read: big) children. But I digress.

The walk took us past a sculpture and carving sector where there was no end of Buddha statues and other cultural-religious iconography in various stages of construction and took a break with a tasty Khmer lunch at a place called Frizz (owned by an expat called Fritz, if you need an explanation). The culinary discovery of the day was Bec's green mango salad which was so loaded with flavour it could have been a vegetarian schnitzel. It rocked. It was mainly mango, of course, with fresh basil, chilli, dried shrimps and countless tasty herbs. My Khmer crepe rocked but paled in comparison.

We decided to bail from the walking tour following this late lunch and, of course, a refreshing but diverting beer. As a result we skipped the Royal Palace and Silver Pagoda until another day and instead tried to find the riverfront by walking down this boulevard that would have been empty if it weren't for literally hundreds of people setting up for an event of some kind. We quickly realised our way was blocked and the river inaccessible and, trying to find our way rapidly back to the well-trodden path ended up once again stumbling through a local-dominated scrub/swamp area that seemed to serve as the back operations for the independence day celebrations. Given our HCMC home invasion experience we made haste, stepping in a filth puddle or two on the way out.

Back on track we finally, and to much relief, made it back to the riverfront bars and restaurant area where we sat at the Pink Elephant for a couple until we realised the best thing about the place was the Engrish-heavy menu, replete with 'testy' dishes. Oh, how could I forget the other highlight - an unused tuk tuk was loaded with young Cambodians which was quickly abandoned when someone apparently dropped their guts, with much laughter and stage coughing. Funny.

We hightailed it back down the Quay a few shops and were astonished by the views afforded by the second floor balcony of the Foreign Correspondents' Club, a Phnom Penh institution. We snagged seats right by the balcony, fortuitously just as happy hour (half price cocktails) began and, to top things off, shortly before fireworks celebrating independence day were set to begin. We got talking with an Aussie and a couple from Siem Reap, our last destination here, and killed time (and brain cells) with tasty cocktails, before the fireworks and happy hour ended at 7. There was also meant to be a boat parade of sorts along the river, with boats all lit up and decked out with Government ministry symbols but apparently they could not make it past the Mekong flow, so we only saw these in the distance, being shoved around by the tide.

After some requisite traffic watching (the thousands of revellers on bikes and in cars turned Sithowath Quay into a one-way street - vehicular democracy in play), we settled back in at La Croissette where we'd quaffed cocktails our first night here. We had a relatively unmemorable dinner (except I had my long-craved cheeseburger) and tried to get a cheap tuk tuk back to the hotel, and ended up walking.

Anyhow, I've gone on long enough and have to talk to a man about a dog. Bec might have a few words. No, she doesn't.

Ciao

Frog legs and curry in a coconut

That's what we had for dinner last night at a traditional Khmer restaurant (well, traditional in so far as they served traditional food, but it was a fairly upmarket type place and not frequented by locals).

The food was good, although the frog legs looked a fair bit like frog legs and it was hard not to imagine them as live frogs while eating them, but they did, as you would predict, taste a bit like chicken with a slightly fishy character. The coconut fish curry, served in a coconut, is the national dish and was awesome. We also had a plate of our new favourite morning glory, which as usual was really nice.

Before dinner we had 70c beers at a riverside bar, and then after dinner we went to a little supermarket to buy more water, and George was seduced by the $7 bottle of gin, which no doubt will taste like crap and we'll probably not get anywhere near through, especially since the many many bars here are so cool. Speaking of which, we then went to a swanky looking bar for some very nice $3.50 cocktails and had a long chat with a Canadian photographer who worked there at nights 'for something to do'.

After this we walked back to our hotel, and I passed out before George had even got out of the shower (at about 10pm). After our many successive days of 5.30-6am starts, we slept like logs until 8.30 this morning and have since had a very slow start to the day, involving breakfast, organising our bus to Battambang, and washing most of our clothes in the sink. We're making an attempt to upload our photos thus far, but the internet here, albeit free, is probably the slowest in the whole bloody country, so I don't think it's going to happen. Apparently our hotel in Battambang has the fastest internet in the country, so at the least we'll be able to do it there.

Our impressions of Phnom Penh so far are very good. The people are really friendly, and generally have very good English, and they actually walk away when you say 'no thank you' to the balloons, dvds, books, etc that many of them are trying to sell. The city is busy, but without the craziness and chaos of Ho Chi Minh City, and it's quite beautiful as well with all the French and Khmer architecture. There are so many restaurants and bars, and the toilets are clean and have toilet paper, which is a big plus after HCMC!

Anyway, we should probably actually get out and see some of it soon since it's already 11.30 and we haven't done anything yet. I'm sure we'll be checking in again soon since the internet is free and our hotel is so welcoming!

What's another word for 'shemozzle'?

I could have gone onto a massive tirade about the total cluster f*ck that called itself a 'Mekong cruise' but we've since arrived in Phenom Penh and our hotel is so damn good I almost cried. Anyhow, to the blow-by-blow description of the last few days.

When we last left you we had just written our blog in the tiniest and cheapest internet spot in the South East - it cost 1500 Dong, or about 10c. We went back to our hotel with the air con thankfully back in business, and had a fitful sleep due to a) the air con being a bit crap and b) the ceiling fan - necessitated by the crap a/c - was a noisy bugger of a thing.

The next morning we were awake briefly before a rude banging on the door to make sure we were up for breakfast. We went through the usual shower ritual - that being the ongoing conflict between getting decently clean and not soaking the throne - and had another local ritual, the omelette and bread breakfast.

We walked to the boat, after losing at least one fellow player to 'getting busy with the toilet' and others to general confusion (and complete lack of head count and other sensible tour procedures). The boat then took us to the floating Mekong markets which were actually quite interesting, with mothers and children rowing up to us to sell us stuff (including beer at 8am) and a mission (by others, not me this time) to the loo, requiring us to anchor up to 3 other tourist boats for these Pommie geezers (one of whom is now a bobbie in Adelaide) to go for a slash. The highlight was a freshly cut pineapple, with imperfections cut out and the whole thing perfectly halved as we watched. It was sweet, juicy and delicious.

The boat then took us to a couple of fairly ordinary tourist activities including a rice noodle factory. While I say it was ordinary, it's interesting to note that rice noodles start life as rice paper - cool. The last stop was a rice processing factory which was actually fascinating, if not only because of the utter disdain for anything resembling safety - tourists were just wandering around these fast, loud and bloody dangerous machines with zero safety gear. It's just the way it's done.

Closing out the day's activities, the boat took us back to Can Tho where we had a lot of time to waste before getting back on a bus. We met up with some decent Aussies who took us to a vego restaurant they'd discovered and it rocked my world - all these dishes were superb and it cost 8000 Dong each - about 80c. Crazy. Bec and I then wandered around aimlessly, then decided to look for a supermarket which turned into a mission, and then landed at a very touristy restaurant on the waterfront primarily so I could use the crapper (and can I say that was one of the day's highlights too).

After the requisite time (and, of course, Vietnamese 'rubber time' for good measure) had elapsed we were on another bus (boat tour my pie hole) and this was another debacle, with some people having been told they were on a 'luxury overnight river cruise' which, cramped on a bus, they weren't happy with. Rubber time also wreaked havoc since us Aussies, having sunk a few beers on the bus and prior, were in need of facilities, and we were always 'five minutes' from our toilet break. Eventually we made to the next town and took a small boat across to the floating hotel, which really was just a glorified boat with a few rooms. We had to take a trip back across the river to get cash since the glorifed boat wasn't glorious enough for credit facilities. Cash in hand, we ate a quite decent meal and had a good chat with a few more poms and crashed after a few beers.

This morning we were again up at arse o clock to get on a boat for another contrived tourist thing, firstly to a floating fish farm which was really about as interesting as my armpit (and just as smelly) then to a small village of a Muslim ethnic minority. Frankly this sucked. This group of people seemed to exist only to sell crap to tourists and it seemed no way to live. We were all back on the boat before the guide. The most interesting thing was the gangplank to land that was so damn ricketty it scared the crud out of me.

The rest of the day was on target, a debacle. It turns out the US$10 option we paid for to get a 'fast boat' was ultimately the only option, since all those choosing the slow boat had been asked, repeatedly, for 24 hours, if they wanted to change to the fast. Mysteriously, our fast boat departed very slowly and, after what seemed a pre-determined time, we turned back to pick up the stragglers on the slow boat whose boat had, conveniently, broken down. That said, they seemed to have fixed it the moment everyone was on board our boat. Bloody arseheads. Clearly there was no intent to take two boats and it was all a scam for an additional $US10 each.

The rest of the day was taken up with more boats, buses and confused border crossings, including our knob guide taking Bec's passport then claiming not to have it, leading to a frantic search of the whole stinking boat, just for us to take it from him. Knob.

All that can be brushed aside as our hotel in PP rocks, we're hungry and we're spoilt for choice for dinner. Can't wait, so I won't. Cheers.

Hot and steamy in the Mekong Delta

It's only been two days but we're already way behind on our reporting - yesterday waking up at 6am and having breakfast at our hotel, we set out to re-explore Ho Chi Minh City. We started at the Ben Than Markets where George bought some long sleeved tops to ward off mosquitos (and probably paid way too much for them too).

Failing any other ideas, we did a mammoth walk to the botanical gardens, which has a zoo in the middle of it. Although we're not generally zoo fans, and the enclosures seemed way too small, the gardens themselves were quite cool, and we saw some absolutely enormous hippos and crocodiles, among other animals.

After this we walked back to our general area, stopping for some pho on the way (meat, vermicelli noodles and lots of fresh herbs and bean sprouts in tasty stock). Being completely buggered from the sun we got an overpriced fruit smoothie in an air conditioned chain coffee shop before recommencing our wandering in an area we hadn't yet explored. This turned out to be a mistake and an experience in itself, as we unintentionally wandered into some very narrow alleyways that were actually people's houses. We were getting some funny looks ranging from confusion to outright hostility (and fair enough since we could see right into their houses), so we got out of there as quickly as we could and went back to touristville for a bracing beer or 4. After this experience we've come to the conclusion that while hanging around the touristy areas seems lame for marginally intrepid travellers, that's actually where the locals want us to be!

After a few beers we went back to our hotel for showers and a quick lie down before heading out for dinner at a kick arse restaurant called Lemongrass. We actually ate there last time we were here but it was so good that we had to go back, and it didn't disappoint. The common staple of a George & Bec holiday is good food, and this place is one of the best anywhere. We started with cold rolls, then moved onto minced prawns on sugar cane, which you wrap in lettuce leaves with lots of basil and vermicelli noodles. We followed this with ginger chicken, steamed fish in a clay pot and sauteed morning glory (a green vegetable that's kind of like Chinese broccoli). It was all so good, and it cost us $US31 - expensive by Vietnamese standards, but you couldn't find anything that good in Australia for that little.

This morning we started bright and early and with a minor fiasco thrown in for good measure. The tour company was supposed to pick us up from the hotel at 7am, and then at about 10 past a guy walked up and gestured to us, looked at our tour voucher and led us to his car out on the street. We were a little confused because we thought it would be the bus that picked us up, but nevertheless we loaded our luggage in the back, got in and were on our way. We'd been driving for about 10 minutes when the guy got a call on his mobile, then drove us back to the hotel. Now utterly confused, we followed him back down to the hotel, where he asked another couple if they were going to the airport. We said that we weren't going to the airport and he just pointed upstairs at the hotel, where the tour guide was waiting for us - somehow this guy (actually a taxi driver) had picked up the wrong people, although god knows what he thought the voucher was that we'd handed him.

So, our problems sorted, the tour bus took us down to the river to the speedboat which took us up the Mekong River for about 3 hours before stopping at a small island where they make honey. There was also a giant python that they handed around for people to have photos taken with, although we declined to get anywhere near the great bloody thing.

We then got on a different boat which took us to a different island where we were shown how to make coconut candy. They also let us try snake wine, which is a revolting alcohol concoction with a dead snake curled up in it. It was gross. After this we were taken down a narrow river channel in rowboats, then got back on the boat and were taken to yet another island, where we had a relatively average lunch followed by some free time to ride around the island on bicycles. We did a bit of this, although as I was paranoid about falling off and getting flattened by a scooter, we didn't go for too long.

The rest of the day was a very long shambles of a boat ride, followed by a bus ride, ferry ride, and another bus ride, and a few aggro tourists mixed in there. We finally arrived at our hotel just before 7 and went out for dinner down by the river. Since we're sweaty and hot and bloody buggered after a 12 hour day, we're now heading back to our hotel at 8.30 to have showers and lie in our air conditioned room preparing for another 6am start tomorrow.

One thing that can be said about these early starts is that we're not drinking anywhere near as much as we usually do - although I think our boat tomorrow will have drinks on board, so I don't know how long that can last!

Ciao

We are here

Just a quick word from me (Bec) before George requisitions the keyboard.

Returning to Vietnam is kind of like catching up with an old friend you haven't seen for years - you feel kind of anxious, worried that things are going to be awkward and you aren't going to have anything to talk about. But then once you're face to face again it's as if you've never been apart, and you just feel comfortable. And that's what it was like when we arrived in Ho Chi Minh City last night. We were inwardly cringing as we came out of the airport with our bags and the mobs descended on us to convince us to come in their taxi, and we assumed they were all trying to rip us off. But as soon as the taxi turned out of the airport onto the streets teeming with scooters, bicycles and cars, we felt instantly at home again. We're staying in the same neighbourhood as last time and have already reacquainted ourselves with the area.

OK, George's turn now.

Bec's pretty much covered it, and there's not a lot to add about our departure from Sydney and journey here. However, I must say I relished my last Vegemite toast for as much as two weeks, having a slightly hung over light breakfast around the corner from the hotel.

Flights, customs, airports, bathrooms and other facilities were all passable or better. Obviously if there was a way to cover vast distances without flying I'd prefer it, and Jetstar's lack of free, mindless entertaiment does exacerbate that. However it did give me an opportunity to do a record amount of reading (finished one book and got 10% of the way into another...) and some sleeping, which turned out to be quite handy given the time difference ended up having a bit of an impact. Another positive was that we had three seats between the two of us and it rocked not having to climb over some joker every time you went for a slash.

I concur with Bec's comments re returning to HCMC. Notable differences include an entirely remodelled airport, one which worked with remarkable efficiency, a huge amount of roadworks (not a little overdue) and a comprehensive amount of new office space coming up (PCA nerd warning:) - there seems to be a bit of 'green' space coming out of the ground too, and a heap of falling down old buildings are being cast aside for the new generation.

Another unexpected change is that most scooter riders now seem to be heeding legal warnings about wearing helmets. This is great since, despite the Vietnamese being amazingly good riders and drivers, and a traffic system that works almost organically, many people are killed each year in motorcycle and scooter accidents. Ironically though the same law seems to not apply to cyclists who remain at the mercy of all and sundry. Oh well, they know what they're doing.

OK, we need to move on but a quick blow-by-blow on our drinking repetoire for the night. After dropping off our gear (finding the hotel in a small cul de sac behind Pham Ngu Lao) we went for a bearings-seeking walk, which took all of a minute since we recognised sites almost immediately. We also spied the Bia Hoi where we got rained in during a thunderous downpour around this time last year. We had a quiet Tiger at a very Western joint called Allez Boo (we'd drunk there last time too) but the loud, crap R&B (a tautology perhaps?) and smell of spew moved us on. We only had to go a building or two to find another bar, of course full only with Aussies, and had (my foolish choice) a longneck of Tiger each (about a buck each - I adore this place). After that, realising it was about 2am Sydney time, we retired to our room, washed off sweat and plane crud and slept.

The room is tiny and the shower and bogger are virtually on top ofone another but the bed is really comfortable and Han, the proprietor, is one of HCMC's 11 million top blokes (and the place costs <$20 a night). This morning aside from breakfast (very tasty simple egg omelette) we've been watching (or listening to more accurately) Obama's history turn, or so we hope. We're heading out now to pay off our tour tomorrow then hit Ben Than Markets for some decent mosquito armour. No doubt there'll be some beers in there somewhere too.

Next report is most likely to be from the riverbanks of the Mekong. Farewell.

PS. Due to a technical complication - i.e. Optus sucks - mobile phone is not working. Either use the gmail (georgebec@gmail.com) or, if it's genuinely urgent, text Bec.

Killin' time at the airport - edit

George just farted. In the internet cafe.

That aside, we've had a good time in Sydney and it seems all too soon to be heading for the airport yet again. Yesterday we went to Bondi and had a stroll along the beach, then did the Bondi to Bronte walk, which is a scenic walk along the coast overlooking the ocean. They've got this sculptures by the sea thing going on, so as you go there's all this crazy art, like animals made of wire, and railway tracks curled up into the air. It was weird, but cool. Of course, we'd decided not to bring the sunscreen to avoid the phone-wrecking fiasco of the last holiday, but, being complete idiots, we hadn't thought to actually apply said sunscreen before leaving the hotel. So within two minutes we could already feel ourselves getting frazzled. After we'd finished the walk we stopped for a mango smoothie and a rest in a cafe in Bronte, then got the bus back to our hotel for showers and, thankfully, we weren't too burnt.

Once we'd rested and refreshed we headed out again to Darling Harbour and sat upstairs at a cocktail bar overlooking the harbour and drinking tasty cocktails. It was a really beautiful day and the view was good and the drinks were going down a treat (we managed to last until 4.45pm before starting this time).

Then we got a ferry to Balmain and met John again for a very copious and extremely tasty Indian meal. The restaurant had an amazing $3 corkage, so needless to say George ducked out for a couple of bottles of wine to wash the curries down. We had a very pleasant evening eating and drinking and recalling bad 90s music with the help of John's iPhone.

After this we were too full and buggered to do anything else, so we just got a bus back into the city and went straight to bed. This morning is pretty much a write off, just packing and getting breakfast and finishing this blog before going to the airport to commence the day of hell that lies ahead.

And now I'm editing this post again because we're at the airport and we've got more than an hour to kill before we even get on the plane. Not at all looking forward to being a sardine for the next however many hours, but it'll all be worth it when we get to our destination.

Next report will be from Ho Chi Minh City!

Bec

Day one - Sunny Sydney

Well, not so much. Sunday, our departure day, was somewhat overcast and miserable. But I'm not paying $2 an hour to talk about the weather. Anyhoo, after an ill-advised big-ish, late-ish night on Saturday we were up and about at sparrow burp and finishing off some very last minute packing. The rest of the morning went pretty much to plan, with the only item of interest on the flight itself being some bag behind us ordering a Bundy and coke at the gentle hour of 9:00am. Amazingly the flight was only 5 minutes late and we stumbled onto the aiport train a collective weary mess. Air travel takes it up the jaxie, that's the summary thus far and we haven't even commenced the 10 hour nightmare tomorrow.

Moving on, we got a train into Town Hall station, having been advised that this was the closest station to our hotel in Ultimo. My limited knowledge of Sydney confirmed this, but alas, I was wrong. We had a galactic mission across sky platforms and chaotic roads, fighting our way through the concrete jungle that is Darling Harbour's conference precinct. When we finally arrived at our hotel, pretty much dripping with sweat and heaving after lugging bloody great bags across this distance, we were dismayed to discover that there was another station far closer. Oh well, if that's the worst thing that happens...

After settling in we quickly began an epic walk that started out as a mission to find lunch. We ate at a little place oddly named Crocodile Senior Thai; it rocked, but it was so damn hot that Bec claims an out-of-body experience. We were also amused by our water bottle, emblazoned with "the happy reading art bear". That breaks my head.

With uncomfortable stomachs we set off along George Street examining the sites of capitalism at its best - there can be no greater concentration of take away and clothes shops in this country. Bec tried her first Krispy Kreme and was suitably disappointed, for an American chain. Damn Yankees.

For want of a plan, we decided to just keep on walking and actually made it the whole way up to The Rocks. It was my plan to get to a great German bar, Lowenbrau, that I'd visited on a previous drunken junket, but our power walking got us to The Rocks far quicker than expected and, surprisingly, we didn't feel like drinking just yet so we settled in at The Rocks Cafe for a coffee. We then did the obligatory tourist thing and took photos of the Opera House from across the Quay and then walked under the Bridge, passing countless meringues (AKA brides) looking resplendent (read: ostentatious) and a groom in a gangster-mode white suit, complete with white rose in lapel. Bloody joker.

The need for a drink began to develop and, knowing the area slightly from our Bridge Climb a few decades ago, began looking for The Lord Nelson Hotel. Failing to find it we slumped into the Lowenbrau where we had echos of our Europe tour with steins (mass) of awesome beer.

I'm being given hints that I'm going overboard with details, so here's the wash up: George got drunk and silly, we caught up with John Lam and hit more beers at the Lord Nelson then The Australian Hotel, where we had fabulous pizzas (at least in my drunken state they seemed fabulous) and left a bit worse for wear. Bec had to get us back to the hotel with me leaning on her the whole way and constantly restating my need for ablution facilities. Needless to say we made it and despite being stuffed I stayed up to watch Rupert Murdoch crapping on about something. Actually, I tell a lie; I was apparently asleep in 5 minutes.

Today we're heading out to Bondi to take a long walk along the coast up to Bronte Beach. We've had a suitably slow morning including the requisite greasy breakfast. That said, we actually did exercise this morning!

Must go, today is looking beautiful weather-wise, and sitting downstairs is depressing me. See you on the other side, probably from Ho Chi Minh City.

George

We're off again!

It's ironic to read our last post on this blog saying that 'one day' we planned to return to Vietnam and possibly Cambodia, and here we are a year later preparing to do just that!

I'll keep this brief, because pre-holiday posts are the most boring in the world, but we're departing Adelaide this Sunday 2 November and heading to Sydney for a couple of days. Then we fly to Ho Chi Minh City and stay for a couple of nights before taking a three day/two night tour along the Mekong Delta, which will end with us being taken over the border into Cambodia and dropped in Pnomh Penh, the capital.

From here we depart from our usual hectic holiday schedule of two days in every place - we stay in PP for four days, then we'll get a bus up north to Battambang, a former French colonial town and the second biggest city in Cambodia. After four days in Battambang we'll get a boat along what's supposed to be the most scenic river trip in the country to Siem Reap, home to Angkor Wat, one of the most beautiful temples in the world.

We'll spend another four days in Siem Reap, and then we depart on the trip home from hell - we fly Siem Reap to Ho Chi Minh City, HCMC to Darwin, Darwin to Sydney, then Sydney to Adelaide.

It was tempting to try to fit in as many places as possible, but we've decided instead to focus on just a few and just do day trips and tours, and hopefully some more active stuff, like walking and bike riding.

So look out for our posts from this Sunday until 21 November when we arrive home!

Cheers
George & Bec